Chapter
2: Getting started
Addiction is excessive involvement,
in varying degrees, with any substance or activity. The costs
of involvement clearly outweigh the benefits, but involvement
continues repeatedly because it is craved. This workbook
presents ideas (and techniques) for overcoming addiction which
have been helpful to many others. Some ideas may be helpful
to you; some may not. Ultimately, you will need to use
your own judgment about which ideas to adopt. There are
as many ways to overcome addiction as there are individuals.
This workbook can be useful if you are ready to overcome addiction
now, have overcome it but want to review your work, or are unsure
about overcoming addiction and want to consider information
about how to do it.
Chapter
3: The initial benefits of addiction
When you began your involvement
with (what has become) your addiction, you liked the substance
or activity enough to stay involved. You would not have
continued unless you liked it at first. Initially the
costs of involvement were probably minimal. As you continued,
the costs got bigger.
Chapter
4: The current benefits of addiction
Because your initial involvement
with your addiction was positive, you stayed involved long enough
to develop a habit (a pattern of regular involvement with costs
and benefits about equal) and eventually an addiction.
Over time you came to rely on this habit or addiction as a means
of coping with other problems. The addiction may now be
your preferred way to cope with one or more problems.
The effectiveness of your addiction as a coping method may have
diminished, but you may not have realized this.
Chapter
5: The current costs of addiction
If a habit is excessively relied
on as a coping method, it becomes an addiction. Although
an addiction may still provide benefits, it also has costs.
These costs may increase over time. Eventually they can
greatly outweigh any current benefits of the involvement.
Knowing and being able to recall the costs of involvement are
essential to overcoming addiction.
Chapter
6: Coping and connecting
There are many ways to cope
with any need or problem. You have identified the needs
that your addiction satisfies. You could learn new coping
methods, ones which would not cost as much as the addiction.
There are many options for learning new coping methods.
Almost all of these options involve learning from or learning
with others. Learning and overcoming isolation are related
projects. We need to balance learning independently with
being tutored, and being independent with connecting with others.
Chapter
7: You have choices
You don't have to overcome your
addiction or change it in any way. You have choices. You
have no choice about dying or certain bodily processes. You
do have choice about almost everything else (even if you don't
like the options available). Others may say that you "have
to" change or stop your addiction, but you don't. If you
are told this, the resentment you feel in response may become
a problem for you. Either cutting back (moderation) or
stopping altogether (abstinence) can be successful ways to overcome
your addiction. Success with either will depend on your preferences,
circumstances, and capacity for self-control, among other factors.
Your life will probably be happier if your day-to-day choices
are based on your long-term goals and ultimate values.
Chapter
8: Identifying craving
Craving to engage in your addiction
occurs at times. You experience craving because you have
had repeated experience with your addiction. The craving
will subside over time if your experience ends. Monitoring
craving is a simple way to understand it better. Craving
is partly predictable.
Chapter
9: Understanding craving
Cravings are time-limited.
If a craving is not acted upon, it goes away. Cravings
are uncomfortable, but not painful. Craving does not fundamentally
interfere with your ability to make decisions. Cravings
cannot force you to act on them. Craving in itself, if
not acted on, is harmless. Despite the harmlessness of
craving, in severe addiction we act on craving as if our survival
depended on it.
Chapter
10: Coping with craving
Cravings are normal for you
and will continue during the first weeks to months of abstinence.
They may last even longer if you are moderating. You are
not responsible for the existence of craving, only for your
response to it. You can cope with craving by avoiding
high risk situations, substituting other substances or activities,
re-directing your attention, counterarguing it, or by distracting
yourself. During your initial efforts at change it may
be better to use avoidance and substitution. As you gain
confidence, reduce avoidance and substitution, and bring out
cravings regularly so that you stay in practice for dealing
with them. When cravings occur spontaneously, consider
them as a sign that some problem needs to be identified and
solved, and as a reminder of the progress you have made.
Refusing offers from others to engage in the addiction is not
difficult if you are prepared.
Chapter
11: Other satisfactions
Before you got involved with
your addiction, you experienced other satisfactions.
Even during your addiction there have been other satisfactions,
but you may have overlooked their significance. If you
overcome your addiction, you create the opportunity to experience
even better and more satisfying experiences in life. Being
productive, having good relationships, and accepting yourself
can be especially satisfying. If thrills are still important
to you, there are other ways (less risky than your addiction)
to experience them.
Chapter
12: Building a new life
You can build a new life that
is even more satisfying than life with your addiction. The more
severe your addiction, the more different your new life will
be. During the initial period of overcoming addiction
your primary focus will be on coping with craving. As
craving diminishes your focus will shift to building habits
which reflect your ultimate goals and values, and which enable
you to experience the satisfactions that arise from these goals
and values. Building good habits (positive addictions)
involves observing the (good and not so good) habits of others,
persistently but patiently taking small steps, revising behavior
as needed to solve problems or fit larger goals, and looking
beyond short-term difficulties to the long-term results you
want. Your new life will also need a balance between momentary
and higher satisfactions. Good health habits establish
a foundation for other satisfactions.
Chapter
13: Following through
Regardless of whether they have
been written down, you have some plans for addressing your addiction.
Reviewing your plans regularly will keep them as a focus of
your attention. You can notice a slip or relapse well
before it actually happens. When you first notice a slip
or relapse on the way, review your motivations for overcoming
addiction. All relapses start as slips, but a slip does
not have to become a relapse. If you follow through successfully,
in time the process of following through on change, and the
process of living your life, will become identical. When
you arrive at this point you will have overcome addiction!
