What are your sources of pleasure?
By Tom Horvath, PhD
If you’ve had addictive problems, you may easily recall experiences (with substances or activities) that you found intensely pleasurable. Addictive behavior can provide that!
However, regardless of how much you are still having that type of experience, you can understand and appreciate yourself much better by examining the other sources of pleasure in your life. A daily review of them is useful. That review could happen at any time, but doing so as you fall asleep is a good way to end the day with a sense of pride and gratitude.
What experiences from your day stand out to you? You may be surprised at what you discover. Here are some questions to consider in that review.
How much did you enjoy sensory experience today? Smells, sights, sounds, physical sensations, tastes? To what extent were your pleasant sensory experiences expected (like going to the beach for sunset, or smelling your coffee), or unexpected (entering a situation with a pleasing smell you were not expecting, or hearing new music you liked)? How long did these moments last? Are there any you might keep seeking out?
How much mental or intellectual pleasure? Did you solve something, advance something, understand something better, learn something, satisfy your curiosity?
How many interpersonal connections today? How much of that connection was expected or unexpected? How profound were those moments? How many connections were with people you know very well, well, slightly, or not at all? How much did these connections involve physical touch?
How many “random acts of kindness” were you able to perform? How surprised were others by what you did?
How much did you laugh? How much were you laughing at wit or cleverness? How much was your laughter a bonding experience, an appreciation of connection or shared experience?
Although on most days we need to accomplish things, how much pleasure we get from our accomplishments varies substantially. To what extent did you feel compelled to accomplish what you did (perhaps to get a paycheck)? To what extent were you accomplishing something that had deep meaning or significance (and pleasure) to you?
Many days have difficult or even painful experiences. However, keeping our pleasures and satisfactions in mind could protect us from an overly negative view of life. Further, it is possible that you have richer and more varied sources of pleasure and satisfaction than you realized. I hope a daily review leads you to appreciate yourself more, and to feel authentic pride in and gratitude for how you live.
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