Updated November 9, 2021 by Devon Berkheiser, Psy.D. Self-esteem is important. When we feel good about ourselves, it’s easier to engage in positive and healthy activities. Self-esteem also prevents us from beating ourselves up when we make mistakes, thus allowing us to get back on track quickly, rather than being overwhelmed by shame and self-hatred. Here are a few tips on how to improve your self-esteem: 1. Challenge negative self-talk We all engage in self-talk. It’s simply the running dialogue that happens in our heads. Unfortunately, not all self-talk is positive, and negative thoughts about the self can be damaging to self-esteem. So be aware of your self-talk and “catch” negative thoughts. For example, if you find yourself saying, “I’m a total failure” when you make a mist...

Originally posted on the Reunion San Diego blog on June 2, 2013 For a long time, addiction treatment programs have used the word “relapse” to describe a return to drinking or drug use following a period of voluntary abstinence by people with drug and alcohol problems. Often the words “lapse” or “slip” are used to distinguish a brief period of “using again” from a return to more extended and long-term use. At Practical Recovery, we’re joining hands with a number of experts in the field who want to do away with the use of the word “relapse” because we think it has negative connotations. As addiction scholar William White, M.A., author of Slaying the Dragon: The History of Addiction Treatment and Recovery in America, points out, the terms lapse and relapse actually have their ...

By Dan Galant, PhD "The Abstinence Violation Approach" - This ominous sounding term from the relapse prevention literature is perhaps one of the most useful concepts to understand in addiction treatment. I often have clients tell me years after our last therapy session that this was the singular most helpful idea to keep them on track! So what’s it all about – and how can it help you? The Abstinence Violation Effect (AVE – think the abbreviation for avenue to help you remember it) is what happens when an individual deviates from his/her plan – and then continues to remain off that path due to frustration, shame, guilt, etc. Think of the problem drinker who has chosen to abstain from alcohol. When that person takes even one drink (”violating” their abstinence), the tendency is to t...

“There were many terrible things in my life and most of them never happened.” – Michel de Montaigne Worrying can be useful since it can motivate us to be prepared. However, too much worry can be problematic and can lead to sleep problems, irritability, poor concentration, and overwhelming feelings of anxiety and stress. Worrying can also be a waste of time and energy. Often, the things that we worry about are beyond our control and no amount of worrying will guarantee a positive outcome. Here are some quick tips for managing worry: 1. Challenge your thoughts – when we worry, we tend to overestimate the likelihood of a negative outcome. So ask yourself how likely that worst case scenario really is and consider other options that may be more realistic and easier to handle. 2. Use...